“I came into this hospital with my son and I am leaving with a bag”.
I will never forget saying those words leaving my mouth or how I felt walking out that hospital without Jack. Looking at that blue bag still haunts me, I should still have Jack at home, not that blue bag.
Hearing Kim Marsh on Coronation Street say “I went into hospital with a baby and left with a leaflet” vividly brought back so many painful memories of losing Jack. For thousands of families across the UK, ...I can imagine this storyline has brought back so many memories of losing their baby, child, son or daughter of any age.
Losing your son or daughter is something you think happens to other people, it’s something you see on the news or read in newspapers but it’s something that you never imagine will happen to you, until it does. In that moment, your life, your past, your present and your future changes forever. One day you’re a mum/dad, the next day your nothing. One day you are doing the school run, making dinner, doing the best time story, the next day your life is empty and meaningless. I describe it as someone putting a bomb under your life overnight and then spending the rest of your life trying to fight your way through the rubble.
I don’t know what it’s like to lose a baby or have a stillborn child and I won’t pretend that I do. I know that I was lucky to have my son for nearly 6 years. I was very naïve when I was pregnant with Jack, I didn’t even know that it was possible to have a stillborn baby and like many others, I took for granted that fact that I had given birth to a healthy baby. This morning I saw the cuddle cot being used during Coronation Street and it confirmed the need for these and the CoverCool and why we are raising money for them. https://www.justgiving.com/…/br…/CuddleCotAndCoverCoolAppeal
What I do know is that we need to raise awareness of babies and children dying and the support services that are in place for families that lose their son or daughter. Brightest Star supports families that lose a son or daughter of any age, from any cause of death but these services should be readily available in every hospital and maternity ward. Sadly that is not always the case and it’s the very reason why Brightest Star exists. To prevent people leaving with the blue bag that I received and nowhere to turn for support, we have designed memory boxes that are available for hospitals or individuals upon request and we offer support groups in Glasgow and Edinburgh and counselling sessions at our Linwood Hulks Haven.
As I always say, if you know someone who has lost a child, please acknowledge their child where and when you can. It doesn’t matter what age the child was or how long ago they died, they are still part of someone’s family.
Its only together that we can raise awareness of babies and children dying and the support services that are in place for families that lose their son or daughter, please help us to do so.
Arlene, Jack’s Mummy xx
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