Sometimes the holidays can be the loneliest times of the year the most. I don't even remember writing this post but it is all still so true...

You might feel sad because it’s the start of the summer holidays, you might feel sad because you have to arrange childcare, you might feel sad because your child gets bored, you might get sad because your child wants to do things and you get sad because of the stress and cost of it all.

I feel sad because my child isn’t here to do all ...of those things. I feel sad because this is the 5th summer that my child has missed. I feel sad because I wish I could have just one more summer holiday with my child. As the schools finish up, I feel so sad that my son is the one that is missing.

I know the holidays can be stressful, routines are disturbed, emotions run high and tempers can get frayed. I know it can be difficult arranging childcare and amusing the children for 6 weeks but that’s what we all signed up for when we had our children. I know that no child or parent is perfect but if your child wasn’t here for the next summer holiday, you would be wishing that you could go back and relive this summer holiday with them all over again.

Jack and I are proof that tomorrow is never guaranteed. Like thousands of other bereaved parents, I will be spending this summer thinking about all the previous summers I had with Jack, I will be thinking about the things that I wish I had and hadn’t done. If I can give any piece of advice, it would be to appreciate and treasure every moment of these summer holidays with your child.

Arlene, Jack’s Mummy xxx

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